I've been in Turkey for 10 weeks and I've been part of Jet Set Zero for 10 weeks. I spend 9 hours a day in a travel agency, I make $4 an hour.
Life is not hard, but it's so much easier in Canada.
I miss my bed, I miss Kwyjibo, I miss my boy, I miss my family and I miss my friends. Last time I left home, I was gone for 4 months. Last time I straight vacationed and I had a pile of money and I knew when I was going to be home and I didn't miss home at all. I'm having a much harder time this time around. Could also be because Istanbul isn't that cool. It is to visit for a week or something, but to be here for 2 and a half months with 2 more to go... it's a little much.
I just want to cry. I haven't felt this shitty about life in a long time. It's funny because I wanted to leave Canada to experience the world and now here I am and I hate it. I'm not ready to give up yet though. This is only the first destination, I know there are beautiful things in the world to see, unfortunately they're not in Istanbul.
For the first time in my life I'm just going through the motions of life. This is what I never understood about people back home, how they just go through the motions and accept it. And here I am, 15,000kms away from home going through the motions.
How is it possible that this is the worst I've felt in years now that I'm finally living my dream?
