There's a hole in my chest...

Hey Everyone!
I've made the switch. If you want to read my previous twisted thoughts, you can get them at http://www.myspace.com/jennyshithead
But this is now a new era. Hello Blogger.

Here are some recent thoughts to mine....I am hurt, I am angry and I am frustrated. I'm feeling everything that I never want to feel. I suppose that is what makes us human though. The bad feelings will always come with the good. Life isn't gravy all the time and that is something I need to understand.

I hate putting my trust in someone and having them throw it back in my face. So does that mean I should stop trusting people? In my 23 and a half years on this earth I have strived to become the person I am today. I am happy with who I am, but at the same time, all these qualities that I worked so hard at obtaining seem to constantly backfire. Being honest with people seems to cause more trouble than good. In order to live a conflict free life are we supposed to lie to ourselves and those around us to keep the peace? I would hope the answer is no but through my experiences it appears as though the answer is yes. I have a pretty fantastic life and I would say I'm happy 98% of the time, but whenever I have a setback it seems to set me back days, weeks, months or even years. I end up back in the spot that I strived so hard to get out of, that spot where I question my actions and emotions.In my head I know I'm being ridiculous, but in my heart all I feel is this terrible, sad feeling. I don't mean to be all emo, but I can't stop it. I'm still trying to make sense of everything, and I suppose that this again is another learning experience that I will take and turn into a positive in the future.

I am thankful for all the wonderful friends I have, especially that silly wombat fucker on the other side of the world. I love you!